Who is really my friend?

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Walking down the path shoulder to shoulder with the only person my soul accepts and connects with. We chatter in happiness, laugh over our jokes, poke each other playfully only to discover that my worries lessen each time we’re together. Gives me a sense of belonging and having someone to freely share my feelings is quite priceless.

Despite the current happy moment, I began to wonder; How do I know if he’s really my friend? He doesn’t know much about my past nor does he know the things of vital importance I hold dear. If am to take him by the hand and travel to my past, will he freak out? Will his perception of me be altered? Does he knows about my aspirations? Does he believe in them?

When it boils down to issues of friendship, our mind might began to wander to and fro to the most impossible or likely possible senerio without in actual fact, grasping accurately on one actual truth.

The complexity of human behaviour and their ability to change due to situations and circumstances have made it more complicating in deciphering who your real friends are. But when you follow the signs that pinpoint who your friends are, achieving your goals, visions and purpose in life won’t be a thing of struggle anymore.

Is very easy to identify your real friends. Very easy and fast but sometimes, we ignore the signs over and over again until the red light start blinking and by then, is already late.

There are three things your friends must do in other to accurately label him or her ‘my friend’ I refer to it as “PAPRESFUT” which means past, present and future. This technique have helped me tremendously and I believe you will agree with me if incorporated.

Now ask yourself;

Does my friend know very well about the mistakes I have made in the past?

“Does my friend accept my present situation?”

“Does my friend believe in my future?”

If you have answered NO to any of the above questions, then your friends is not really your friend. If your friend accepts you despite the numerous mistakes you have made. If he or she accepts your present without being ashamed of how you dress, flaws or the family you came from. If he or she believes in your great future and speak excitedly about it, then he or she is indeed your friend.

Why live in perpetual torture by living a life of pretence just to make friends or gain their cheap acceptance? We tend to overlook the big picture always, rather we focus on the temporary gratification which is so stale.  Don’t be surprised if your self worth gradually degrade and you find yourself struggling in the sand like a fish caught in the hook. Is better to live without friends than to live in an imaginary shadow that you feel fits in.

Being in the right friendship is one of the greatest gifts you can ever give to yourself. You don’t have to hide who you are or dwell behind the wall. You don’t even need to pretend or claim to be what you are not. You just spurt out your feelings freely. One of the mistakes we make is that we are always in a haste to belong. To feel accepted. Don’t ever be in a haste. What’s friendship if you can’t express your feelings without fear of been judged? A wrong companion is like finding yourself in the shoes of a fly caught in a spider web. You might strive to make it work, to make it last. It doesn’t dispute the fact that you will lose at the end.

Make the right true friends and they will in turn, take you to your desired destination. That’s one of the ultimate goal in friendship. To help each other succeed, to inspire ourselves and stick together like a glue.

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